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  • Writer's pictureJayna Newbold

What's Love Got to Do With It?

February: Heart Month!

It’s time to check your ticker, Dear Hearts! Whether it’s your physical one, relationships (romantic and otherwise), or the myriad of candies for sale, February is loaded with love.

With that, I am reminded of chorus lyrics sung by Tina Turner: What's love got to do, got to do with it

What's love but a second hand emotion

What's love got to do, got to do with it

Who needs a heart when a heart can be broken

Better to have loved than lost than never to have loved at all? Alfred Lord Tennyson may have hit the proverbial nail on the head for us single folks.

Even U.S. Presidents need the love as their special day is set aside this month.

Okay, so why February? you may ask.

Well, for one thing, unless you have the coin to fly off on vacation to a tropical paradise, or hit the slopes for a good time of winter fun, there simply is not much else going on in the month of February!

That, and as most people opine, Hallmark needed a holiday. So, Valentine’s Day, it is!

Nothing against this so-called “holiday”, but my late husband and I never needed a special day to celebrate our relationship; and heaven knew I wouldn’t know what to do with a huge white teddy bear holding a red heart - nor did I need sugar.

We never were eager to jump on these bandwagons. Even when our friends were having Vows Renewal ceremonies - complete with wedding garb and reception - we agreed that when we said “I do”, we meant it the first time and neither one of us saw a need to do it over. One couple spent at least ten grand on their event - which inspired my wonderful husband turned to offer the following proposal: “If you want to renew our vows, I’ll do it. Gladly. But if we had a disposable ten grand, I’d rather get a bigger TV screen, hold your hand and tell you I love you in front of it.” Ha ha ha! I laughed really hard at that one, but wholeheartedly agreed.

Although he often brought home a bouquet of my favorite (pink tea roses) for Valentine’s Day, what I loved more was when he gave me flowers or some other thoughtful gesture “just because” at random.

However, our wedding anniversary was close to Christmas (What were we thinking?). So, from the time we had children, we never managed to get around to celebrating our memorable day until February. Skipping the hearts, flowers, candy, and Hallmark greeting cards, we opted to “make a memory” together. Typically, it involved an activity we both enjoyed sans kids: a delicious meal; a hiking / nature adventure; an excursion; or even a quiet evening at home while the grandparents spoiled the offspring.

Please don’t misunderstand, Dear Hearts! I love love. And I have nothing against Valentine’s Day. If there’s a special someone in your life to whom you wish to pledge your feelings, this is the day / month to do it. If for no other reason, it’s a nice reminder to do something thoughtful for someone who holds significant meaning in your life.

As for the aforementioned presidents - living and “graduated” - we celebrate all of them on President’s Day. Some of us even get a three day weekend out of it. And let’s not forget that it’s Black History Month. Although controversial - even within the Black Community as the actor, Morgan Freeman, claims that the race should simply be included in all of history, period - I am Grateful to learn about contributions made by these folks which I may not otherwise be aware. Why not celebrate them? I love it.

Finally, with February being Heart month - and all of you Dear Hearts are close to mine! - it’s never a bad idea to pay attention to the health of that important organ. By now, many of us have already fallen off our I’m-gonna-eat-healthy-this-year resolution we made on January first and it’s time to re-group (even though those Girl Scout Thin Mints are calling my name!). While we’re on the subject of health, make sure you include a mind and spirit checkup. Whatever works for you - prayer, community worship, meditation, yoga, fill-in-the-blank - be certain to include that precious self-care into your daily routine.

But you know all of this, Dear Hearts. I’m not telling you anything new.

Meanwhile, if you’re looking for a good read during the month of LOVE, I highly recommend “An American Marriage” by Tayari Jones. Whatever your marital status, it’s a great tome. Or . . .if you’re looking for a lovely little short story, check out “Valentine Vignettes” by yours truly. Either way, Dear Hearts, be good to yourselves and others. Enjoy your life and those with whom you choose to encircle yourself.

What’s love got to do with it? Everything!!

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